Are you kidding me!

I am 27. I live my life on my own terms. I have a career to look forward to. I have caring friends and family. I like what I am doing and, most importantly, I am very comfortable with where I am standing, which refers to the rock solid steady hands beneath me that I have nurtured through my lived experience. In other words, my age. I think I am not the only one - people around me, my friends, cousins, family members, everyone of us is absolutely comfortable and more than happy to accept the realities of life, and elated to announce that they are living life with full 'masti'. So at this juncture, when Priyam suddenly one morning introduced me to an advertisement of something called '18 again,' honest to god, I just could not believe what I was seeing or hearing. As if the women's movement never happened, as if people like Simon de Beauvoir or Kamini Roy were never born and the whole idea of feminism or women's rights was just another myth. Let me give you a more detailed picture of what I am saying. So, '18 Again' makes female rejuvenation and tightening gel, so that women can get back their spicy life - again! No, I am not kidding, yes you heard me right, that is exactly what I said. The website is obnoxiously illogical and the kind of punch lines that they have used are so overrated that I wonder whether such women exist at all. If you don't believe me, check out this link: http://www.18again.com/web/ And if you can't believe your eyes or your other sense organs, then please call yourself normal. Try reading the punch lines accompanied by beautiful faces, representing Indian women. I hope your blood boils. I hope the blood pressure starts to rise, at least. One of the products that caught my eyes was called a vagina tightening gel and the advertisement for it left me awestruck and horrified. If this is what we are waiting for and if this what feminists are fighting for, the so-called women's rights, then I have nothing to say. There is this woman who is singing her lungs out saying that she wants to be a virgin - again - and how wonderful it would be! Hello? Just when I thought I should let it go, I saw this line, "After all these years in love, we have fallen in love again!" Really? I mean your relationship is so fucking lame that you need a fucking tightening gel to fall in love with your beau. Forget about being a feminist or anything, but from a man's perspective, isn't it an insult for them too? I mean, aren't we just saying that men can only measure their love by is by analyzing the way they are participating in sex? I mean, isn't it too terrestrial after all? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgqiO4sd848 Try tolerating this ad for 3 minutes, and if you think you can, I think you have more willpower than Bhagat Singh. Ouch! My day got more amusing as I found out that this shit is endorsed by another shit in the form of Celina Jaitley. The reason why she is endorsing it because she is a mother and she understands the importance of such products for women. See, I do not want to elaborate more, as I believe that would lead me only to use profanity in one single sentence, but I have just one thing to say. So, motherhood is a hindrance for everything you want to aspire, at an age and time when you think you can't! Wow! I am sorry, but this simply is not acceptable. If marriage or giving birth to your child takes away your happiness in bed and your partner thinks that you are a bore, then madam, the problem lies much deeper, and a fucking tightening gel will not give you the satisfaction you are looking for.

          I have no problem with anyone's personal decisions in these cases. Everyone has the right to do whatever they want, after all, it is their life. My problem lies in the fact that these and other products like s whitening creams or even clothes are marketed in such a way as if life without them is useless. And that you, as a woman, do not have the same existence as you would by just being yourself. Then, our mothers or grandmothers probably do not have right to live. Is this what we call a revolution? Celina Jaitley is someone whom, if you avoid, you won't be taken to jail for sure, and she understanding the pain of women's passion right after marriage, is probably something which she herself is facing. I personally feel that it is derogatory to women and men. If such things could untangle the complexities of life, then probably suicides won't happen, girls won't be thrown out by their husbands, physical abuse of women would become a myth. I am sure all of you have seen the ads for Fair & Lovely or even Vaseline body lotions, the promotion of which happens along the lines of  'confidence.' Honestly, do they really think that all a woman cares about is to look fair and that her confidence would be back if a notorious passerby gave her a second look? Fair skin, glowy cheeks, luscious lips, killer figure, and now a tightened vagina - that's what Indian woman are or for that matter, any woman. Every woman standing at their age, I am sure, are confident in their own way and accept the natural process of aging. For god's sake, no one would like to go back 10 years in their life just to feel how they did the first time  and buy something which would let them have that when they have passed that stage long back. Probably, they would, but the reasons, I am sure, will be far different. If this is feminism, if this is women's liberation, then we are going in a very wrong direction. I am sure half the population is unaware of Irom Sharmila's work. Because she doesn't come in T.V. often, does not use a skin lightning cream or a vagina tightening gel, and is not seen in Page 3 parties. Can't we make people like her our heroine? There are so many things that we can worry about, but definitely not this. A few months back, a company even came out with a lightening toner to make your private parts fair (I am not kidding, seriously). Do you have anything to say for that, I urge you, please say!

           That stupid 'dabba of cream' costs more than what a man probably earns in a month. So,  for a wife to get back her long lost love, would have to spend her husband's hard-earned money and then, expect miracle to happen in bed. Wow! I mean that would definitely boost up a relationship, or maybe, this is exclusively an elite product, which is out of reach for most of the middle class. So, all you middle class house wives, sorry, we do not have anything to offer you, you simply have to go on mopping and watching your t.v. serials! Uurrrrgggh, please rise up! This is not what hundreds of people fight about when they talk about women's empowerment. Don't let our ancestors commit suicide in their graves. I am not asking anyone to be a radical revolutionary, but at least, question things that happen around you. If you want to be young, and be in love, there are other ways. Be happy, be caring, laugh, see the beauty around you, live for yourself, eat healthy and you would beat any Aishwariya Rai hands down. Simply, be yourself. Let 'natural' things happen to you naturally. That's what life is. I am no great soul to lecture anyone on life, but these are some little steps towards a much greater goal. We have to live, but we can do it in our personal ways. Cheers!